A warm personality and a sense of humour made singer Emil Chau popular. But last year the laughter stopped. Here, he tells how he rescued his marriage.
Wearing a baseball cap and bouncing about his living room, Emil Chau looks more like a happy little boy than the superstar who has dominated the Chinese music market for almost 13 years. At his concerts here last year, tickets sold out in record time, and extra shows had to be scheduled to keep up with demand.
Part of his exuberance is due to the success of his 25th album, Storyteller, which was recorded with the help of many of the industry's top artists. Covering a variety of styles and topics, the album includes the first single Feel Troubled, written with Jonathan Li, which reflects on problems that Chau and his friends have faced.
For the singer, one recent challenge has been balancing his mega-stardom with his commitment as a husband and father to his wife of 13 years, Constance, and their children, Andrew, aged eight, and Anya, three. Earlier this year, his wife suffered a nervous breakdown over her husband's relentless schedule. She became very depressed, and rumours flew that the couple's marriage was showing signs of cracks.
Today, at 38, Chau finally admits he had been through a dark period. But now he says he feels "reborn" after the trauma, and is now mellower. Gone is the "killer look" of his earlier years, which had everyone dubbing him "Heavenly King Assassin." Any kinks on the home front appear to be ironed out too, as Chau happily adds that Constance has taken up her hobby of painting again -- an encouraging sign. Says the star, "I think we understand each other much better now."
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Exclusively for The Singapore Women's Weekly, Emil Chau shares his thoughts on his family and new direction in life. Emil Chau's appeal lies partly in the fact that he's a devoted family man. His relationship with his wife Constance has endured the test of time. The pair met when times were bad and he was still a struggling singer in pubs and clubs. Emil frankly admits that many times it was Constance's encouragement and love that kept him going. The night before they registered their marriage, Emil was performing onstage and realised halfway through that he had just $10 to spare. He couldn't even afford something decent to wear for the special day. As luck would have it, his boss came to the rescue and loaned him $100 to buy a proper pair of trousers. The couple almost didn't hold a formal wedding banquet either. However, according to American custom the bride's family pays for the wedding dinner, so three months down the road, Emil and Constance had a church wedding in the United States with her whole family in attendance. Though Emil has always talked openly about his family, his attitude changed ever since last year, when popular Taiwanese actress Bai Xiaoyan's daughter was kidnapped and murdered. Now Emil hardly ever takes his family out with him to formal events. Nor does he allow anyone to take their photos. Who can blame him for being a protective husband and father?
I've been working too hard for the past five or six years, and I had no energy left. I was drained -- not just physically but emotionally too. As an artist, I also needed to re-assess the market. From last year's sales, it seems a lot of people supported alternative music, and I think they need something new. I've been asking myself, 'What kind of music do Asian people want?'
Rest! I tried to keep my brain clear and get back in touch with the world. I've been doing the same thing for the last 13 years, and I felt I had moved too far away from society. So I spent a lot of time watching the news on CNN, and reading the papers. Most of all, I wanted to know more about young people, their thoughts and values. It's not because I want to make money. I just want to feel that connection with the audience again -- something I think I've lost. I also decided to open my studio so I could experiment more with my music.
[Laughs] It's fake! She's only in kindergarten, she can take the joke. But my son is older, so it's too risky to make a joke like that about him.
Well, we always sing together. My son is old enough to enjoy listening to two singers: One is Michael Jackson, the other is his Daddy. He listens to Jackson's songs all the time. In fact, we plan on singing the duet he does with Paul McCartney, The Girl Is Mine, at a party to celebrate the first anniversary of my studio. Naturally, we can't wait -- both of us are very excited about it!
I'm still waiting for the day he can tell me the meaning of the songs that I've written specially for him. I'm really looking forward to that!
They both love singing -- my wife sings to them more than I do. I don't know if I'll encourage them to go into the music business, though. If they do, they have to find their own way, and not because they've got me to lean on.
I was lucky -- I got married before I released my first album. At the beginning, my company said it would be better if I didn't mention I was married. They hoped it would get me more fans. I told them I wouldn't lie. If fans like my music, then they like my music. Whether I'm married or not has got nothing to do with it.
I watch TV, but my wife hates that. Constance grew up in a family that didn't watch TV. She's very conservative that way. For vacation, we usually get away from Taiwan. This year, I took my family to Tokyo Disneyland and visited some cities in Japan. We've also been to Malaysia and Singapore -- I like Singapore a lot!
She may be American, but my wife is practically Chinese now! I think an important part of our marriage was learning to understand each other. When two people get married, it's like asking a question that you'll never find the answer to. But learning about each other is the fun part -- when you are 80 and look at the other person, you'll know what the meaning of life is.
When we first got married, we were still like a dating boyfriend and girlfriend. Even after our first baby, we still felt the same way about each other. I think the key to romance is the element of surprise. I try to surprise my wife all the time. And I love making her laugh -- it makes me feel good.
The first year we were married, I wanted to prepare a very special Valentine's Day gift. I decided to go to the studio and record a special song I had written for her. I spent the whole day there, and when I got home she was upset. She had wanted the two of us to spend the day together. But all was forgiven when I played her the song.
Flowers! No matter where I am, I'll always have a bouquet delivered to her -- it works every time.
Yes, producing an album is the best way to lose weight! I wake up and come to the studio at 7am in the morning and don't leave until 2am the next morning. Sometimes I'd even sleep over at the studio. Now that I'm nearly 40, people ask, 'Why do you work this hard?' But I'm not really different from when I started my career. The way I live, dress and eat are all the same. It's something I'm very proud of.
After my break, it suddenly hit me that I'll sing and write songs forever. For the last 13 years, I've always felt like my Mum would tell me one day, 'Hey, go get a real job!' But after my latest album, a colleague said, 'You've changed. Now you're more mature.' These days, I look at myself at a real singer. It's the only thing I want to do until I'm 80!
I'm trying new things now, and I'm really enjoying it. Things are going well, and for now, I just want to enjoy my life! |